An Emotional Day

Today was such a great day where Gideon was concerned. We just clicked, and things went so smoothly. I didn’t get all of the items checked off of my to-do list, but what I did get done was so pleasant because Gideon was involved, and we took turns doing what the other needed or wanted. He helped me with my chores, and then it was time to wrestle and tickle or just play together. I thank God for giving me this day with Gideon. He’s such a blessing in my life!

In another aspect of my life, today has been very emotionally charged and not for the reason that you might think. Even as I type right now, it’s so distracting. There is a wide rainbow band covering the top of my WordPress browser and I just have to roll my eyes because #truelovealreadywonlongagorightoutsidejerusalem and #rainbowsareasymbolofsomethingmuchgreaterthanlgbtpride.

No, today was emotionally charged because here in the Cincinnati area thousands of people were tuned into the funeral events for a city police officer who was killed in the line of duty a week ago.

Officer Sonny Kim and family
Officer Sonny Kim and family

Daniel was recently promoted from Corporal to the position of Sergeant (so proud of him) and is a member of the Honor Guard, and so he was one of the many faces present at this event. He stood in the pouring rain, one of many officers lining the path to Officer Sonny Kim’s grave site.

Daniel is second from the right.
Daniel is second from the right. [source]
There is no question I know the risk Daniel takes every time he puts on that uniform and does his job. The community he works for can feel more at peace because he is making it safer place.

But sometimes, days like today, the selfish/weaker part of me wants him to find another career. I would much rather he spend his days in an office or somewhere business or retail-like where the risks are minimal. Then I realize that, while there is no place that is immune to safety risks these days, he is a great part of the reason there are still places where risk is minimal. And I respect that.

The strong/unselfish part of me tells me that Daniel is wonderful at what he does, is with a great group of people to support him, and this cannot be an added area of fear in my life.We have made dear friendships with some of his co-workers and up until work schedules did not allow, we led regular Bible studies together. To this day we attend weddings, and each other’s children’s birthdays. I’m so glad Daniel is part of such a great team of men and women. ¬†Fear already has enough of stronghold in my life, and it won’t have this part of me. The part that prays and has full faith that God is watching over him, and will have His way in Daniel’s life, no matter the outcome.

My deepest condolences and prayers go out to the Kim family.


Terrific Two’s: Meltdown City Part 1

 Gideon is officially of age to begin taking some daily activities into his own hands. He wants so badly to be independent, and have control of something. When he feels too tightly bound or like no one is listening, those famous toddler tantrums ensue. I avoid talking or reasoning with him too much when he is in the throws of a fit simply because he’s too upset to process whatever I’m trying to communicate. 

a toddler fit? me??
I am learning that no one discipline style fits all the moments of Gideon’s life that require discipline or guidance. He’s not a robot and I can’t presume to help or “fix” him with a manual-following approach. 

Parenting Gideon has become more difficult – not because of Gideon, he is a 2 year old who is acting and behaving appropriate for his age – but because this new important phase of his life requires me to humble myself and practice self-control and self-awareness like never before. He needs guidance, and I find myself being the one who requires the discipline.

My goal is to model the fruits of the spirit for my son, and show him how much better life is if we confront the challenging moments in life with love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. That means I’d better get cracking! And it’s tough!   

I’ve been making my way through this book

I read books like these with the goal of finding things that apply and are useful to my personal life. While I don’t agree with everything the author believes, she makes some pretty solid points. Not to mention, although she appears to be  a secular writer, she inadvertently emphasizes how vital the fruits of the spirit are in raising happy kids. More to the point of this blog entry, she believes that parenting has more to do with the parents’ behavior and how we act, and less with how children perform at different stages of development. I could not agree more!   

gideon and his cousin taking it easy at the pool today

Next up in part 2 of this little series I want to note the strategies that help me keep my mommy meltdowns to a minimum and guide Gideon through his age-appropriate ones.