The first thing Gideon wanted to do this morning is climb onto the cedar chest by my bedroom window and look outside. “Mama? Snow?”, he kept asking me. He has been obsessed with snow ever since our first big snowfall of the season last week. He ran a fever the few days the white fluff stuck around. So Gideon did not get to actually play in the snow until this past weekend when most of it had melted.
Gideon’s second fall and winter season will be one of the most exciting for him. He was still to young to understand the potential for fun in seemingly miserable weather, and his little mind wasn’t able to process the hugeness of our white-covered back yard as something he could access, touch, taste, and smell. Gideon is getting better and better at appreciating the details, the little things, that make mundane daily tasks worth learning about and emulating. Not long ago Gideon thought nothing of getting put into his high chair. His attention was not on the little steps it takes to get him there and secure. A week later he is really observing, and spends a few minutes after meals trying to work the waist buckle. His tiny hands grasp the pieces, and work so hard to accomplish that “click” he hears when we snap him in. Gideon thought nothing of where his grapes come from, and now one of his favorite things is pulling his own grapes off of the vine. If I put myself in Gideon’s shoes, as someone who knows so little but wants to learn everything, it actually makes the idea of daily life a little more exciting. He takes so much pride in accomplishing his little goals, and it motivates me to keep things in perspective when I start to feel overwhelmed.
This week Gideon is learning that snow melts and disappears. He misses it! I can’t wait for the next snow, just so I can see the excitement in his face. Like he’s seeing an old friend.
This Thanksgiving I have so much to be grateful for. After God’s grace and love, I think I am most grateful for being a wife and mother. I want to soak up every day of my life with these two men – one big, one little – and never forget just how blessed I am. I hope this season you can focus on just how thankful you are for your spouse, your significant other, your children, the people in your life that you are blessed to know.
I leave you with an excerpt from a blog that I follow. It moved me, and rings true with this mother of a little boy. I hope it strikes a chord with you too.
One day that little boy will be a big man. There will no longer be any sweet words whispered to me in the wee hours. Just the whir of the sound machine and the snoring husband. I will sleep peacefully through the night, never a worry of a sick child or a crying baby. It will be but a memory. These years of being needed are exhausting, yet fleeting. I have to stop dreaming of “one day” when things will be easier. Because, the truth is, it may get easier, but it will never be better than today. Today, when I am covered in toddler snot and spit up. Today, when I savor those chubby little arms around my neck. Today is perfect. “One day” I will get pedicures and showers alone. “One day” I will get myself back. But, today I give myself away, and I am tired, and dirty and loved SO much, and I gotta go. Somebody needs me.
– Megan Minneman Morton from Your Best Nest